A Little Christmas Humor

This poem has been a prized possession of my family for many years. I am sure we are not the only family that fits this poem and if we are it will give you a good laugh, which we all need. "THE BOX QUEEN" Heaven help me, I am turning into my mom !! It's something you pray will never happen to you. For as long as I can remember, she has stood at an elbow while a package is being unwrapped, when the contents are held up, the box never touched the floor. Mom has it squirreled away in a closet somewhere. If you are giving someone a hard to wrap chain saw, she has the box for it. If you have an oversized velvet Elvis painting, she can put it under wraps for you. Christmas, however is her finest hour. We learned early that Christmas packages were never what they appeared to be. A rectal thermometer box always gave a recipient pause until it revealed a fountain pen inside. A small jewelry box with the promise of a drop-dead diamond held a fishing fly. Mom tolerates Christmas, but what really brings a smile to her lips is the class of boxes that are distributed. We added a new relative to the family one year who put a Tiffany box under the tree. Mom could barely contain herself. We were to see that Tiffany box for the next 10 years. Once it held a bird feeder, another time a smoke alarm and and last year, a beach towel. I was reluctant to admit I was turning into a "box junkie" when my daughter pointed it out to me at her birthday celebration last June. I found myself in a tug-of-war with my Mom over a Nordstrom box. She said it was hers originally, I said she had never stepped foot in a Nordstrom store in her life, and it was mine. She said she had traded me 2 Sears boxes for it and I had just forgotten about it. My daughter intervened at that moment and asked if we would mind postponing the argument until she opened she opened the contents of the box. She said that I needed help, but believe me when I tell you that I am nowhere the fanatic about saving boxes as my Mom is. Her closets and storage spaces hold nothing but boxes inside of boxes, I'm not THAT far gone. I was ironing the other afternoon when Mom dropped by, "What are you doing?" , she asked."I'm ironing old tissue paper and ribbons. See ? They are like new." She looked at me a long time and said,"YOU NEED HELP !!!"